Sunday 1 October 2006

if he hates reading it will be all.my.fault

We sent Cass to bed early tonight.

Things were quiet out on the sunporch, and I glanced out to see an odd flash of light and to hear my daughter's giggle as she crawled out of the dryer. Cass was still in there when I hit the porch door, panic and sheer scared fury making my voice shake. He's been warned before - the dryer is so not a place to play - actually, they shouldn't even be playing on that side of the porch at all, and the gates and barriers will have to be raised accordingly. After a quick three minute lecture (You KNOW you don't do that! You could get hurt! You could get trapped and I wouldn't know where to find you!) I could feel my blood pressure rising and cut to the chase over his protests.

"Upstairs. This minute. March. Into your pyjamas and bed. I am so angry..."

He went, but he hated it. And he wasn't shy about telling me. Bear went in there when it became apparent there was a mutiny - C was sitting cross-legged on his bed in his underwear, saying loudly that he WASN'T going to put on his pyjamas, and he WASN'T going to sleep all night long. And that in the morning, he was NEVER going to TALK to Mommy AGAIN.
I let Bear sort that out while I re-set the gates on the porch and started getting Miss Rosey ready for pre-bed stuff.

Cass was still crashing around in his room when she went up to her crib. Mutters of "NOT going to sleep NOT" could be heard. I went in to check on him and he was sitting bolt upright on his bed, assorted cars strewn around him. Must have been fun, playing in the light from the night-light. I kissed him and ignored his vows of perma-wakefulness, and left.

A few minutes later, he pulled open his door and asked hopefully "Mommy? Are you coming to read books to me?"

When informed that no, there wouldn't be books tonight, that getting sent to bed was a punishment, and he needed to go to bed, he burst into loud wails and told us that we were SO RUDE to him, that he was going to tell MissMacGyver on us (Cass can not say his pre-school teachers name correctly. I don't think anyone in his class can.) and when he grew up, he was NEVER going to read AGAIN.

So, crap. While I am strong in my conviction that they should never be playing in or around the dryer (and that frightened me so badly the hair on my arms still has not gone down) I never want to curb his love of books. I think kids (boys, especially) need all the coaxing to use the library and read every day they can get.

Tomorrow he will have forgotten all about this, I know. But is it a good idea to withhold reading a bedtime book as punishment?

9 comments:

MsCellania said...

YES! It lets him know what he did was a huge infraction of the rules, as you value reading so much. You can use "That hurt me as much as it hurt you, as you know I adore reading to you children!" line too.
Oldest has been sent to bed a couple of times w/o reading. He remembers both times and still talks about it! And still loves to be read to and read, btw...

It beats the heck out of whacking them, Jess!

Trina said...

Absolutely. Losing out on story time is my son's most hated punishment. He loves his story time. The quickest way to get him to understand that he's done something really wrong is to tell him he gets no stories that night.

You are not going to scar him emotionally by doing this. He WILL read again! And he'll probably think long and hard before trying something like crawling in the dryer with his baby sister again...

Don't beat yourself up - I think you handled the situation perfectly. :)

Susan said...

We had the SAME evening with Henry tonight. He and Cass can be illiterate together.

Sheesh.

Major Bedhead said...

Yep, I think you did the right thing. It sucks to lose something you love as a punishment. Maybe that will sink in.


I do love the SO RUDE comment. That's hysterical. :D

Canada said...

Like they said. And the fact that he was upset about not reading makes it a valid punishment. It's one night.

And I'm glad I'm not the only one with a kid who states that he won't sleep all night. Corwin often tells me he's going to :sleep with his eyes opne", lol.

molly said...

One night without stories will just make all the nights to come,with them, all the sweeter.You handled it like a champ!Give yourself a pat on the back instead of all this guilt!

Jeanne said...

I do this quite often too, and like the others, my kids STILL want to be read to after. He was probably saying that more to try to hurt you than because he really meant it. I remember saying things like that to my parents when I was mad, and it was all about trying to make them feel guilty too.

Washington Crunchy Mama said...

Yes, I think you did a great job! Taking away the stories for the night re-enforces the fact that reading is something special, something that should be honored, not just something that you get reguardless of how naughty you behave.

Anonymous said...

I hate it when we take reading away from the BoyChild. Cause he will be never read and it will be MY FAULT! Part of taking it way is that it's not just about the reading but the snuggling and the talking and the learning how his mind works when he tells you what he thinks of a story. Yeah this one is hard for me too.

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